Tuesday, September 10, 2013
You'll be standing in line. And you'll see a baby. Just there. Over his mom's shoulder. Quiet. Staring at you with blue eyes. You'll smile at it and think about how cute it is. And something deep inside you won't... immediately dismiss the sentiment of maybe - just maybe - one day becoming a mother.
And over the following weeks, months, and years, you'll start to feel the urge to want to know what it's like to truly have something of your own. Something created inside of you. To experience sharing life with something that can learn from you, 24/7. Grow up next to you. Depend on you. And, later, thank you for all you've done, as you do with your own mother. You'll start thinking about settling down, committing, and finally letting go of that glacier of cynicism that had once poisoned your emotional progress.
And whatever guy you're with at that time will reap all the benefits of your maturing, softening heart. Of your growth. Of your eventual retrospect. Of your wiser philosophies and calmer, pastoral outlook on life. He won't be any different from other guys. He won't possess anything you haven't seen before. And he certainly will not have been there through your darkest hours, your most difficult nights, or your most outrageous and unfair moments. He will not have earned you in any way other than simply coming into the general vicinity of your life after you're all fixed up, shiny and better.
He will enjoy the heat of your fire without ever having to build the pile, or spark the flame himself.
He'll just... be around at the right time.
One day, it'll happen.
Saturday, September 7, 2013
No one is going to save you.
No one has the time to really care about you. Prayers will not fix your problems.Another person won't make you feel whole. Very few people have the time to act like friends, and most people secretly want you to fail. They all talk behind your back. Nobody can truly catch you. Everyone is busy. The world, by and large, doesn't give a damn about you. You are on your own. There is no backup. There are no mulligans. There are no reinforcements coming.
You just have to get fed up, pissed off, and take it all out on Life, hell-bent on revenge for everything that it's taken from you, wrestle it to the ground, and step on it's throat on your way up.
The real world doesn't owe you anything and you don't owe it any mercy.
Kill it. Kill it to live on.
Monday, September 2, 2013
"You made me confident in myself that it's okay to be me. You gave me hope. Hope that there are good people out there. Hope in life and love and good things. You wrapped it up in a pretty package with a shiny ribbon on it and... I ignored it. I abused it, neglected it. I refused it. I refused to see it. And you just... wrapped it up again and made it glow. You made me see it. That's something... no one else has ever done.
"So... thank you for that."